uccellodifuoco: And I am so fucked up (006 - Nothing but no trust)
Phoenix Ikki ([personal profile] uccellodifuoco) wrote2012-08-16 07:54 am

18th Rise of the Phoenix ஜ Action/Voice [Backdated to the 15th]

[To be honest, Ikki hasn't slept at all. He has stayed awake in his room, glaring at the clock as it slowly ticked away the minutes until midnight hit and with it came the official start of the new day. Another August 15th, another birthday he never expected to "enjoy", the third spent in this place which only reminds him that he's on his way to his third year in Luceti as a whole. He spends the night sulking to himself before leaving early in a poor, and probably useless, attempt to avoid Smoker and the rum cake he knows that is going to show up sooner or later for as long as possible.

He never wants to celebrate his birthday, this year isn't an exception. Selphie isn't here anymore, which is good because it means there's one less person who will know that it's his birthday, but deep inside it just bothers him that she's not here. Hyoga isn't here either, still kidnapped... Assuming that they didn't send him away while they had him, but the Cygnus cloth is still in his room after he recovered it from where Hyoga had camped so he will keep some hope and assume that he's still there somewhere.

At least he has Kotomi, except that even after confessing to her, he still doubts he deserves her or that he can do any good to her. Actually he doesn't have doubts about that, he knows he doesn't deserve her and that he can't do any good to her, but he also knows that she's in his heart too deeply for him to be able to take her out of there and not bleed completely. He may be the immortal bird, but his heart holds enough wounds as it is, he doesn't really want to kill his heart completely even if reason sometimes tells him that it would be the best option. At any rate, House #26 will have Ikki knocking at the door early in the morning, not too early for it to be a crazy time to show up but still early enough so that no one, specially Kotomi, won't have plans already.

Because of that Ikki will spend most of the day with his precious treasure, hanging around, having lunch at the Seventh Heaven... Though knowing them, they will probably end sitting somewhere with her reading to him. And by sitting somewhere it means him sitting and making her sit on his lap so he can lean his head against her shoulder and read as she does while holding her waist in a loose hug, discretion be damned... It's advised to not stare though, as the phoenix doesn't deal well with that.

Later, once Kotomi is delivered safely back to her house, just in time for dinner, Ikki will crash at the Good Spirits for a few rounds against his liver. Just so it doesn't forget the habit, you know. A few hours later, a drunk Ikki will be fumbling with his journal. Maybe next year he will remember to lock it away before he gets drunk but for now... Have a drunk message before you go to sleep Luceti, please don't mind the slur in his words.]


I bet you were thinking about how great she is and how I don't deserve her or some shit like that. Well!! I know that already. I know that I don't deserve someone as sweet and innocent as Kotomi, I know I don't deserve to be alive. But you know what? I'm screwed up, because no matter what you throw at me I just won't die, I will keep fucking returning from hell as if it was any Tuesday. And I love her. And she loves me! I don't know why or how she can do that, but she loves me. So until she stops loving me or I can finally die... What was I saying? Hey, where did the whisky go? Tch, it keeps vanishing, stupid glass. Stupid drink.

Anyway! [Pause as he tries to remember what he was saying. No really, it has left his mind.] I don't care how bad I am, or how little I deserve to live or to be with Kotomi. It just happens, I always deal with all the shit life has in for me, I take it even if I don't want it, so I'll take this too, because I want it. I love Kotomi and until she gets tired of me, you lot better stop looking at her like that, because she's my girlfriend. And you!! Shitty Malnosso, I bet you had a blast taking my sister and my friend, well, have all the fun you want, but if you touch one hair of Kotomi's precious head there won't be enough magic, divine power or whatever to save you from the hell I'll send you all to.

[ooc: You can crash into Ikki and Kotomi while they are together, just leave a note in the subject so we can both tag back.]
etudes: (grave)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-16 02:41 pm (UTC)(link)
There's a lot of them in here. I didn't look yet to see which ones.. [ She's opening the book now, scanning through the pages a little, but at the same time she's probably enjoying just the sheer peace of the two of them being here together like this. ]

.. Does Ikki-kun have a fairytale he likes a lot?
etudes: (it has a language of its own)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-16 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Ikki-kun.. doesn't remember them? [ she tilts her head sideways a little, removing the book just enough to be able to see his face. ] Why not? Did Ikki-kun not like them?
etudes: (malinconico)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-17 01:10 pm (UTC)(link)
.. That's.. sad.

[ She frowns slightly, even if she's not really upset, it's just as if she's trying to illustrate her words with it. ]

Everyone should be able to happily listen to fairytales.. .. Does that mean I have to make up for it by reading them to Ikki-kun now?
etudes: (and it talks to me in tiptoes)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-18 11:39 am (UTC)(link)
[ It's okay, she likes it when he deres. So the frown slowly turns back into a smile when she can feel his warm hand on the side of her face. ]

I want Ikki-kun to be happy though.. happy no matter what. But.. if Ikki-kun says he's happy like this, then I'm glad. I'm really, really happy like this too, just being like this is.. nice.
etudes: (it cries out in the darkest night)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-19 10:37 am (UTC)(link)
No matter what? [ She seems a little surprised at first, but then she realises that.. well, she's the same, right? As long as he's there.. ]

.. When Ikki-kun's there, I'm really, really happy too.. So.. I think that if Ikki-kun would ever leave my side, I'd be really sad.. I don't think I would be able to stop crying at that time.
etudes: (calore)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-25 11:37 am (UTC)(link)
That's.. why Ikki-kun's so amazing.. [ Although, judging from her blissful blank smile, she could probably sum up many more reasons why the guy is amazing to her. Since he's strong, stronger than bullies, but at the same time he's nice and always listens to her reading and talking and he would never leave her alone or forget her or-- well, the list goes on like that. ]

But.. what if I left Ikki-kun's side? Would Ikki-kun be sad too then?
etudes: (espirando)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-28 04:47 pm (UTC)(link)
[ There's a very, very slight moment of awkwardness. Kotomi is oblivious, after all, but she can't be oblivious to his anger when he's lying there right on her lap, when he's touching her. So she does wonder if she did something wrong, but.. he is still caressing her, so.. maybe it's okay..?

She's still a little worried though, so just to make sure-- ]


Is it.. a bad thing? [ Since he seems angry and all. ] Don't worry, I won't leave Ikki-kun..
etudes: (only seventeen and tired)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-29 10:56 am (UTC)(link)
[ She nods at it - she does believe what he's saying, it's just that she got a little worried back there. And Kotomi quietly stares down at him for a few moments, as if she wants something but isn't directly asking it as usually.

It's only after a few moments that she seems to give a hint about it, reaching out towards him a little with her arms as if she wants a hug. ]
etudes: (she hates the sounds goodbyes make)

[personal profile] etudes 2012-09-29 04:20 pm (UTC)(link)
.. Hmm, it's better.

[ She smiles the moment she's drawn into his arms, and even moreso when she's this close to him. The girl closes her eyes a little and leans her head against him, almost as if she's sleeping like this - she isn't, though, she's just trying to soak in the feeling of being here in his arms. ]