uccellodifuoco | 19th Rise of the Phoenix ஜ Voice

Entry tags:

19th Rise of the Phoenix ஜ Voice

[He always thought that his worst months, the ones he hated the most, were August and September, to be exact the last half of August and the first half of September. But this year Ikki is realizing that he hates February even more. He feels like a caged furious tiger, knowing that something is up, that something is going to happen and that it probably will happen to him and totally unable to do anything to avoid it or escape from it. All he can do is pace in his cage, glare and growl, acting all tough, while inwardly praying to every deity for things to remain fine after the month ends.

He hates to have his feelings played with, he specially hates it when because of that women are hurt once the experiment ends and they realize it was all fake and even if it wasn't his fault he hates it and blames himself for it. But mostly, he hates the idea that Kotomi may be affected again, that come the 14th she may be wandering around the village again, a chocolate box in her hands, ready to give them to someone else who isn't him. And with that hate comes the fear that it may actually happen. That even once the experiment is over she may come to realize she doesn't love him that much or just that the other man is better than Ikki and so he won't just lose her for a few days but forever. But there's nothing he can do to avoid that, to try to ensure that doesn't happen, at least nothing that isn't downright cruel and probably illegal.

Any other day he would convince himself that even if that happened it would be for the better for both of them. But this month he finds himself unable to fool himself as easily as the rest of the year. He may lose Kotomi and not just because it was meant to happen but because a childish so-called scientist thinks that playing with people's hearts is a good experiment. He definitively can't accept that. So rather than just sit and lay low, uncaring for the world, Ikki finds himself more restless than ever. And he realizes it's worrying when he actually grabs his journal and makes a post, hoping that despite some people's strange behavior there will be some left normal enough to engage in conversation and distract him for a bit.]

Hey, Luceti... How many of you have actually ever gotten anything "good" from all the crap the Malnosso put us through? Experiments, drafts, kidnappings, you name it. Do you even bother with trying to find a positive thing to some of those things? Make the best out of it or however you want to say it.

And how many of you have got things downright ruined, or at least damaged enough, because of those thing? Even if you managed to fix things up later on or if you still are dragging along the luggage of that disaster. I'm not asking for details, I'm just curious as to how many chances do I have to not end this month wanting to kill everyone in my sight who looks like a scientist with a weakness to play with people's feelings.

[Private to Kotomi]

I love you.

[Normally he wouldn't say it so openly -even if this is private for just her-, but it's the most direct way he can think of checking if Kotomi has been affected by an experiment or not this month. The day she doesn't answer or answers anything different than showing that she still loves him he's going to have a heart attack.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Oh, and you stopped being the Phoenix Saint here?

[Spoilers: Marco does mean it seriously, and already considers Ikki his brother. Oops.]

That's a great idea! I'll put Leanne in charge of making it. [Deadpan, but serious about this too.]

Let's see... I live in the village, I don't wear my Cloth at all hours, I share an apartment with a man who isn't a Saint or anything related to them, I don't fight at every odd hour, I have a girlfriend, I talk with people who aren't Saints neither are being attacked, I don't have to go dragging the ass of a goddess out of whatever mess she's ended in again and I haven't died even once in three years.

That's pretty much the complete opposite of what I did as the Phoenix Saint, so I would say that, in some way, I'm more Ikki now and less Saint. I'm still a phoenix though, that thing can't be shook off.

[Ikki is too tsundere and has too many issues to consider that for real, even if Marco isn't a pure saint himself, Ikki still doesn't think he deserves something like that.]

Make sure to add a note about how we don't discriminate about types of birds. Unless you have something against hens or something like that.

[Which is impossible because... It's Marco. Ikki's pretty sure that he would accept even penguins.]

And yet, being Ikki doesn't mean that Ikki isn't affected by Saint Phoenix Ikki. You still fight, you still wear your thingy, and you might die in the line of something else. Look it's forever going to be part of your past. And if it really doesn't matter, if you really have nothing to hide, then go ahead and protect her, but make sure you're protecting her, not yourself.

Nope, I accept all birds. Even PenPen! Although I think he's technically more pet, his "owner" Shinji is more PenPen's pet. [What were you saying about penguins? That'd be a yes.]

Actually I don't think I have really fought or wore my Cloth in the last months at all.

[Maybe Marco is right after all. Maybe that's why he still feels restless and out of place. Because he tries to separate the Saint from the man, but what else could he do? There's no way the Saint can be compatible with the life the man wants and has. There's no Athena to protect, there are no other Saints, and though there are evil beings that try to cause havoc there are many people ready to take care of them and those evil beings are in the lesser numbers. Back when he arrived he still wore his Cloth and fought, there was more chaos around, but now? Now the Saint has no place here, only Ikki does, but it has been so long since he was just Ikki that it makes him feel incomplete.

And yet, accepting that Marco is right and that the Saint is also the man, to try to make it all compatible... It feels as if he would be giving up completely to the fate Mitsumasa Kido forced on him, and he doesn't want to do that. He can't do that.]

Who's PenPen?

[He doesn't pay much attention to others' pets and he doesn't know Shinji either.]

And yet. You are who you are. Simply being able to find a place you don't have to fight so much doesn't change that. Rayleigh retired as a pirate, but he's still the Shadow King. It's part of who he is.

PenPen's a penguin. He's Shinji's friend. Good taste in fish. [:|]

Was he forced to be this Shadow King by a man who impregnated women all around the world and then used the kids as canon fodder by lying to them? Did he have to go through a hellish training and forget who he was in order to become the Shadow King?

[Ikki's tone is hard and cold. No matter what, he refuses to accept it, to give in and accept that Ikki and the Phoenix Saint really are the same. That he would have become a Saint even without Mitsumasa's actions. And he won't accept examples of people who weren't in his same situation or a similar one.

He snorts as Marco clarifies who PenPen is.]

When I thought you would even accept penguins I didn't expect it to be proved so soon.

That kind of depends on your world view of Gold Roger unfortunately. Technically, he had one kid, but he knew he was dying long before he conceived the kid, and he knew there'd be a witch-hunt for the kid by the marines, so he got a psychopath to promise to protect the kid and the kid's mother. The mother had to hide the kid in her womb for twenty months, so she died in childbirth, the psychopath frequently threw the kid to literal tigers and beat him up in training and in order to be a marine, and to the kid's dying day, he thought almost the whole world hated him for the crime of being born.

Silvers Rayleigh didn't have it as rough as that kid in my opinion, but he became a chronic alcoholic and skirt chaser and I'd bet my life that there's not a day that goes by where he doesn't think of his old captain and how he never even told him about his child or that he was leaving him in the care of the marine.

What's wrong with penguins? Penguins are awesome, eh. I also like the pokemon birds.

Sounds like another kind of asshole. I suppose that "at least" he cared enough about the mother and the child to search protection for them, beats me why he would choose a marine.

Either way... Your world really is screwed if even a baby is considered a criminal just because of who his father was.

[Definitively Marco is no racist against any birds, nope.]

Pokemon?

I guess. And I guess Garp probably could afford Rouge more protection than someone like Rayleigh, but it's still messed up.

Right, like Skarmy, the metal bird that is an ally to Sheimi, or Little Ikki's bird friend Soren.

[He agrees with that, who wouldn't? Even if Roger still guaranteed the protection of the woman and the child it was still a dick move that he pulled off, no matter how one looked at it. And the protection thing was questionable yet, the pirates could have just taken the woman with them and keep fleeing, wouldn't they? Finding a ship in that world can't be easier than finding wherever she was living and seize the place forcing her to do that madness of keeping the baby for twenty months. Ikki's surprised she didn't die earlier than that.

Still he can't keep that part of the conversation, because the other part is throwing him off his feet too much.]

A metal... Bird? Is that what "pokemon" are?

They're all different animals. Pokemon are weird. One was a giant electric ball. I've stopped questioning it.

... I think I'll take your advice on that.

[An electric ball, really?]

You really take the term "bird-lover" to new heights.

Well, I am one.

The New World doesn't exactly come with opportunities to meet fellow birds, other than seagulls. And none of the other bird zoans really.

So you want variety, huh? No wonder you're so enthusiastic.

Heh. Maybe. I guess I find it easier to bond with birds than most people too.

I'm not going to wonder why you do that. But I will wonder if I should worry that means you see me more as a bird than as a person.

[Just joking. Ikki doesn't care enough for what people think of him to wonder about that, not even the people he cares for.]

[/ahem.]

[Marco sooooo doesn't look straight at the camera at that.]

Aye, because I definitely don't already think of you as my phoenix-bro or anything, eh?

[Definitely not :| :| :| Oh wait....]

[Unfortunately, or not, Ikki has enough issues to not take that too seriously. Mostly because it's "phoenix-bro", clearly Marco only has any sense of appreciation for him because of his status as a phoenix, rip that off and Marco won't give him even the time of the day. Or at least definitively wouldn't call him "bro", which actually kind of ties to what he joked about regarding been seen more as a bird than as a person.]

Yeah, definitively. And it's not as if you're making up a bird family or anything, no.

[Laughing on his end.]

Aye. My fiance isn't a Robin, and Ace reminds me nothing of an angry chirpy Oriole whatsoever. And Leanne doesn't remind me of a little heron sister at all.

[Deadpan. FOREVER. And Ever.....]

[That only helps to cement Ikki's idea that without the phoenix Marco wouldn't care. He still laughs.]

You know, I hadn't noticed the thing about Robin.

[Laughs.] It is actually a coincidence, I promise. I wouldn't trade my non-bird family for anything. Pops, Namur, Vista, all of them. I guess I've just been lazier about my comfort zone here, eh?

I suppose. Had there been a volcano here I probably wouldn't have moved from there most of the time either.

Volcanoes are your comfort zone? [He's pretty amused by this truth told.]

[Not really.]

Back in my world I live in one.

[Meaning he secludes himself in one until he has to fulfill his role as a Saint.]

In order to get stronger, I take it?

19th Rise of the Phoenix ஜ Voice

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60% // lost this tag my bad :<

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%

[Voice] / Private about 60%